It’s getting closer!  My little girl is about to make me a grandpa. I am so not ready for this.

When my kids were born, I had such plans for them.  I was going to teach them, love them, show them … save them.  Not sure I’ve accomplished any of that, but at least I knew what I was supposed to do and I tried.

But a grandson?  What am I supposed to do with that one?  What is my role?  Sure, I can still teach him and love him and show him and maybe even save him, but it feels different.  I feel much less in control than I did with my own children.  I feel much more vulnerable.  What if he or his mother or father don’t approve of my loving and teaching?  With my own children, I always had the trump card that I could play:  “Well, I’m your father, so deal with it.”  But as a grandpa: “Just a crazy old man with antiquated ideas”.

And yet, maybe that’s the point.  As a father, I have learned so much of God’s love and sacrifice for those he loves; but maybe as a grandfather, I get to learn of his grace and the freedom that he affords us to love or reject. Maybe here, I will finally understand what it looks like to give without expecting or obligation, but simply because … because he is my grandson.

I am so not ready for this.  And that is such a good thing, for it is always in the uncertainty that we learn the most.

But I’m still not wearing overalls!

To the King,

David